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January 2020

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The new parenting surprises

As a Doula and a Mom of many I have seen so many discussions and have had so many chats with new parents. It’s so amazing to me that a lot of things are just not discussed between them and their doctor or midwives.
Who is going to be the one to just come out and say…"it’s not all glamorous when having a baby"! How about the things you were never told about? Do you recall the book "What to Expect When Expecting"? Well what about a book that was called "Everything Nobody Told You About When Expecting" or "What to Expect Now That Your Child Is Here"??? hmmmm…. maybe that can be my next book!
Oh how I wish our babies came with a step by step manual, but then again we would need one each and every phase of life until our very last day of life because we will never not worry about our babies.
Ok so we spend 9 almost 10 whole months carrying this precious child in our womb to grow and become this tiny human that we can not wait to hold. There’s been so much planning on how we would do things to setting up the nursery to what car seat we would choose. Oh and what about all the decisions….? To vacinate or not to vacinate? To circumcise or not to circumcise? What should we

use cloth diapers or disposable diapers? To breastfeed or to bottle feed or formula feed? You get my drift right?
Anyway.. How about just raise your child with what is going to be best for your family. Don’t compare what you are doing to what someone else is doing. Don’t think just because someone makes that decision it is the right one because there is NO right or wrong way to raise a child. Man do I ever wish that the came with a manual.
From that very first positive pregnancy test to the time that you bring that little bundle of joy home there’s ALOT that nobody has told you. Let me just put it out there… From the labor pains that make you feel as if you’re body is about to turn inside out comes this beautiful baby as a matter of fact the most beautiful face that you have ever laid your eyes on. God is amazing for that once your baby is born the pain of the contractions are gone in the blink of an eye so that you can focus on your little one. Then no one tells you that you still have to push out the placenta as if having the baby wasn’t enough. (don’t worry that’s the easy part) just something people forget to tell you. Then comes the faucet and I am not just talking about the tears you will shed but the postpartum bleeding for weeks on end sometimes (that you think will NEVER end) and the milk gates open like there’s no tomorrow. So you just feel as if you’re leaking in every direction to say the least.
Oh sounds fun right? Ummmm…. maybe or maybe not. Oh don’t forget you will still have your belly after the baby too! It doesn’t just magically disappear like we would like it to.
Then the time comes when you are waking up in the middle of the night and you feel like you will NEVER SLEEP AGAIN. Don’t worry you will or maybe you won’t until your child is 18 years old or in my experience you will NEVER stop worrying so sleep is a thing of the past.
Hey but listen…. God has chosen you to be this baby’s first provider, protector, nurse, chef, taxi (forever), teacher, first love, counselor, bank, playmate and so much more. We have a HUGE job but it’s a rewarding job. We will have a challenging road and no matter how old our children are they will always NEED you.